Seriously, if millennials love anything more than craft beer and avocados it’s grouping things into lists. Every time I get online I see some Huffington Post list telling me places I should see and things I should do before I’m 30. The pressure is suffocating honestly. I compiled a list of the most millennial things I could think of, therefore I deem this list the most millennial of all lists!
5) Craft Beer:
Like I said in the opening paragraph, millennials love their craft beer. Gone are the days of just drinking Bud or Coors. We want craft beer, and we want to know our beer’s story. Where’s it from? Who brews it? Do I taste a hint of orange peel? The more unique the better!
4) Bashing Chain Restaurants:
I’m not sure if this has more to do with sticking it to big companies, or if we’re just tired of always eating at the same boring ass places. I could personally never eat at a chain restaurant again and I’d be completely happy. Take me somewhere local that has a creative menu designed by a hipster chef. Don’t forget, millennials are ruining Applebees. White Squirrel >>>> everywhere else
3) Becoming Vegetarian/Vegan:
Chalk this one up to equal parts wanting to positively impact the environment and not being able to sleep at night thanks to Netflix documentaries. Seriously, ALL food documentaries on Netflix will fuck your mind up. I used to pound chicken wings like there was no tomorrow, now I eat black bean burgers and kale? Nothing makes sense anymore.
2) Complaining about baby boomers:
Whether it’s over their complete inability to grasp basic functions on Facebook or their unwillingness to acknowledge that Obamacare and the ACA are the same thing, boomers are frustrating. Nothing quite brings millennials together like a little boomer bashing. They’re not all bad, we still love our parents. But we also can admit the progress we’ll make when they’re all gone. Kidding of course….
1) Listening to podcasts:
I’m basically listening to a podcast during every waking moment of my day. Whether it’s sports, comedy, educational, current events, or serial killers? Yes, they have serial killer podcasts. Anyway, there’s a pod for everyone and for every mood. Anytime I mention listening to pods to anyone over the age of 40 I basically get looked at like I have 3 heads. They’re the entertainment of the future! Perfect for multitasking, I drive, shower, and cook while listening. If you don’t listen to podcasts, it’s time to start!
*Barely missed the cut*
Coffee: To millennials coffee is basically on the same level as their craft beer, the more unique the better. We don’t want just “black” coffee anymore from a pot. We want frothy goodness, bold and full flavors, with the little leaf design on top. Also, I want almond milk thanks.